Alala News

alalanews·Blog·December 30, 2016·0 comments

New Year, Same World

Everyone keeps talking about how they can’t wait until 2016 is over. And I get it. 2016 was kind of a shit hole year for common decency, society, human rights, the environment, most pop music, and my exercise regime. But I’m not losing myself in my 2017 calendar, full of blissful wonder. After all, besides a change in year (that I… Read More »
alalanews·Blog·November 8, 2016·0 comments

The Election That Fear Built

Okay. It isn’t funny anymore. I’ve been feeling kinetic. Manic. My anxiety is tangible; it drips down my fingers like the juice from a recently peeled orange. I stick to the table with it. I have energy but I can’t move. It’s either the election making me feel this way or this sick case of PMS I got. I could just be… Read More »
alalanews·Blog·March 29, 2016·0 comments

Trump’s Biggest Fault: Making Cruz Seem Reasonable

You could use many words to describe the 2016 presidential election. Perhaps you would choose, “long,” “terrifying,” or even, “egalitarian,” if by egalitarian you mean that you believe that all people deserve the right to become president… even the ones that don’t. Personally, I would choose, “crap,” “misleading,” and “can’t-you-just-kill-me-already?” But I respect your choices. I’ve stayed pretty silent this… Read More »
alalanews·Sights·January 19, 2016·0 comments

ABORTION! a love story

What happens when a woman meets her uterus for the first time? PICNICS! ROMANCE! ADVOCATING FOR EQUAL RIGHTS! Special thanks to all involved in this one! My writing partner and co-producer, not to mention an excellent uterus: Kolyn Brown Back-up Dancers: Ilana Webber and Dana Thomas The Priest: David Neutche Carly Fiorina: Lara Mahler Cinematographer: Jack Curry (www.heytheremynameisjack.com) Audio: Kyle… Read More »

February 1, 2017·0 comments

How Donald Trump’s Penis May Save America

In Republican-Land, the world is made up of patriots and snowflakes. The patriots like guns, meat, “man” things, empty storage facilities, coal mining, whatever the opposite of recycling is, and things with large horns. Snowflakes are made up of the “hilariously” devised acronym, “SJW,” sore losers who cry when they don’t get their way, and women — specifically the ones… Read More »
December 30, 2016·0 comments
New Year, Same World
November 8, 2016·0 comments
The Election That Fear Built
November 6, 2016·0 comments
Men Who Can’t Deal: Birth Control Edition

February 15, 2015·0 comments

Femmesplaining Episode 2: Birth Control

The second podcast is finally here. I know you’ve been waiting anxiously, with bated breath, as winter crept over the land and, perhaps, into your soul. I may have arrived later than you expected, but I have returned with some hard hitting truths, ready, at last, to bring you home, to keep you warm, and to light the dark. Did I… Read More »
January 11, 2015·3 comments
Femmesplaining Episode 1: The Vagina

alalanews·Sights·January 19, 2016·0 comments

ABORTION! a love story

What happens when a woman meets her uterus for the first time? PICNICS! ROMANCE! ADVOCATING FOR EQUAL RIGHTS! Special thanks to all involved in this one! My writing partner and co-producer, not to mention an excellent uterus: Kolyn Brown Back-up Dancers: Ilana Webber and Dana Thomas The Priest: David Neutche Carly Fiorina: Lara Mahler Cinematographer: Jack Curry (www.heytheremynameisjack.com) Audio: Kyle… Read More »
alalanews·Sights·January 26, 2015·0 comments

Obama to Congress: I’m Not The Only One

Obama sure seemed tough at the State of the Union, bragging about the elections he’s won, but now the speech is over and it’s back to business as usual – Congress is back to ignoring him and he’s back to… wandering Central Park in the snow. Here he is singing to Congress, wishing for friends, throwing some balls, and just… Read More »